What parent doesn't love seeing their progeny lift a trophy or stand atop a podium? It is an affirmation that their genes are good and it confirms that their decision to sacrifice their time and money was wise.

Equally, seldom will you find a coach that doesn't enjoy the ego surge when their athletes or team win a title or cup; it is the ultimate validation of their ability and experience, technical and tactical knowledge.

Of course, for schools and clubs, winning has become a critical part of running viable programmes. It affords them the perfect opportunity to showcase their programmes and provides great promotional material with which to attract the next group of aspiring young athletes.

And let us not forget the regional and national bodies. Most are highly organised and run a myriad of age-group events, tournaments and fixtures, all aimed at identifying the best of the current crop. Results and performances are generally the most influential criteria for selection into any national or regional squad or team.

However, maybe the adage "all that glitters is not gold" rings true here. How many young athletes that don't get picked and don't win, drop out of their sport or sport in general? How many winning athletes at secondary school level go on to make their mark in open or senior grades? How many become the next 'big thing' in their chosen sport? How many simply remain active in their sport?

Our biggest concern should be that the youth sport success structures within which most sports operate have a seriously negative effect on the welfare of all our sports.

We are a very small country, with an even smaller base of "talent" to work with. We cannot afford to operate a system of deselection that causes large numbers of participants to drop sport altogether.

Too many athletes move away from sport because they are not big enough, not strong enough, not fast enough or not skilful enough. Yet perhaps the most important 'nots' are found in "not yet" or "not this sport".

As golf coaches of predominantly teenage athletes, based at a secondary school within an Academy set-up, my coaching partner and I are constantly mindful of the three-headed beast that is performance, development and participation. Each level is important in its own right but without strong participation it is almost impossible to develop or perform.

Our Academy goals have evolved significantly over the 10-year period we have been in operation. Initially our focus was more targeted at performance and success. In the last couple of years our goal has been more about growing the game of golf by exposing more students to it and by enabling them to stay involved without making unrealistic demands on their time or energy.

We have a far more inclusive environment trying to be accommodating of both differing ambitions and different current levels of skill and commitment.We came to realise that we wouldn't probably become the number 1 sport of choice at our school but we could become the #1 second choice sport. The sport that everyone chooses to do when they have time and when they want to relax.

We still strive to compete and be successful but we have reframed our definition of success to ensure that the attributes of integrity, attitude, grit, determination and effort are recognised, valued and celebrated.

We believe these attributes are cornerstones of an individual's sustainable commitment to their sport and any lasting success, whether it is in sport or in life.Ultimately, the true measure of the success of ours or any programme, that may or may not win titles, trophies or podium finishes, should be the quality of the individuals that it produces and the degree of individual growth that has taken place.

Legendary American basketball coach (and teacher) John Wooden once said: "Success is peace of mind which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to do the best of which you are capable."

I think he was right, after all what more can you ask of any athlete or young person?

Simon Thomas and Reon Sayer coach golf at St Peters School, Cambridge, Waikato.